Couch Potato Chronicles: 101 Excellently Written TV Shows

The Writers Guild of America East has compiled a list of shows that it considers the best written in American TV history.  This is debate fodder for sure.  Besides, some shows that are critically acclaimed are rubbish (to me, anyway).  Argue away!

Throw the Book At Them: the 50 Most Hated Literary Characters

It is time to get your hate on, bibliophiles!  (Especially you, La Parisienne and Kamikaze Editor!)  See if you agree or disagree with the choices and rankings of the 50 most hated characters in literature.

I gotta say, though, this list has utterly endeared itself to me by proclaiming that the #1 spot belongs to Bella Swan and Edward Cullen and #3 to Holden Caulfield.  YESSSSSSSSSS!  (Remember my previous hating on "Twilight" here and on Holden Caulfield here.)

Here, let me give you the top 10 for you to harsh on to your heart's content:

1. Bella Swan and Edward Cullen
2. Cholly Breedlove
3. Holden Caulfield
4. Scarlett O'Hara
5. Iago
6. Anita Blake
7. Tom Buchanan
8. Heathcliff
9. Dolores Umbridge
10. Dorian Gray

For the record, I hate plenty of the people on the list, but I reserve a special nerd-rage for insufferable #43 Robert Langdon, whom not even lovable nebbishy Tom Hanks could make me love.  By the way, Satan barely makes the list at #50 ... because, I suspect, Milton did too good a job in Paradise Lost and turned the Prince of Darkness into a too memorable an eloquent anti-hero.  I mean, you gotta give props to a poet who lets Satan hold a pep rally in hell.  I'm serious!

Call Me Ishmael: the 100 Best Book Opening Lines

This list is, of course, subject to debate!  I for one cannot stand James Joyce.  Oh, here, let me give you the top 3 novel openings.  I approve of the first two, though I think the opening of Dickens' A Tale of Two Cities should have ranked higher than Gravity's Rainbow.

1. Call me Ishmael. —Herman Melville, Moby-Dick (1851)

2. It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife. —Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice (1813)

3. A screaming comes across the sky. —Thomas Pynchon, Gravity's Rainbow (1973)

For the record, I don't think Salinger belongs on this list.  Holden Caulfield is a loser!  Also, there are far too many 20th-century books in this list.  

Holden Caulfield Is a Loser: P.J. O'Rourke 1, J.D. Salinger 0

I had forgotten recently how hilarious O'Rourke can be.  I love O'Rourke and hate most "modern" literature, so this is just too good not to share:

It was a travesty of literary justice that we waited until J. D. Salinger finally hit the delete key at 91 before admitting that Catcher in the Rye stinks. The book’s only virtue is that it captures, with annoying accuracy, the maunderings of a twerp. The book’s only pleasure is in slamming the cover shut—simpler than slamming the door shut on a real Holden Caulfield, if less satisfying.

Meanwhile, don't even get La Parisienne and me started on how much we hate Kerouac.

UPDATE: I just found this.  Awesome.

RELATED POST:  American Literature Smackdown: Flannery O'Connor 1, Harper Lee 0