Satire Alert: "Everyone In Middle East Given Own Country In 317,000,000-State Solution"

Since the Middle East is going up in flames and the much-ballyhooed 2-state solution doesn't seem to be feasible, the humorists at the Onion have another proposal.

ISIS, the Caliphate, and the War On History

So ISIS (or ISIL or you say tomayto, I say tomahto, you say bloody-minded extremist, I say violent jihadist) has renamed itself IS (Islamic State) and declared a caliphate.  Bold and risky move.  See too the role of history, mangled and otherwise.  While we're on the topic,  don't forget this:

By formally abolishing the Syrian-Iraqi border ISIS doubtless hopes to evoke memories of the Ottoman era before supposedly artificial states were constructed for the convenience of European powers—a time when frontiers were porous and the ways of Islam were universally observed. The fatal flaw in this utopian vision—apart from its obvious historical inaccuracy—is its failure to recognize the division between Sunnism and Shiism that long predated Western interventions in Iraq and Syria. ...

However much the leaders of ISIS seek to draw on the imagery of an international Arab jihad rolling back a century of Western imperialism, the growth of ISIS feeds on these sectarian tensions that have been reanimated across the region. Politically, the jihadists have gained support from the widespread hatred of the Shiite cronyism of the Maliki regime, which replaced the cronyism of Saddam Hussein’s, as well as from the brutality of its counterpart in Damascus. And to the extent that foreign powers are driving the situation, the underlying dynamic flows less from the West than from the rivalry between the Sunni monarchies of Saudi Arabia and the Gulf on one side and Shiite Iran on the other. 

"Borderline ... feels like I'm going to lose my mind"

Maybe we should stop blaming colonial borders for the Middle East's problems? (And, no, I won't apologize for quoting vintage Madonna first thing on a Monday morning.)

Big Pharaoh's "Complete Idiot's Chart to Understanding the Middle East"

Big Pharaoh's a long-time Egyptian blogger (and tweeter), and this pseudonymous wit has come up with the fittingly, deceptively named, and only partly tongue-in-cheek chart that the WaPo ran a few days back.  If you haven't had a chance to look, take a gander:

Even Big Pharaoh himself admits that it's incomplete and he's constantly having to add to it.  I have to say too that there aren't enough red lines directed at Israel, but perhaps hating Israel is taken so for granted that it's not even necessary to note the fact.  Since the "USA" means for all intents and purposes "the Obama Administration," it should really have green lines going in every direction possible, y'think?

The Purple Woes of Cairo

Things are getting ugly (OK, uglier) in Egypt as the military attacks the Muslim Brotherhood, which is pushing back.  Here's another awful aspect that should not be overlooked: Morsi supporters have set fire to a number of Coptic churches.