The Battle of Salamis: 2 Germans Hospitalized After Vicious Food Fight

I simply must quote the entire headline plus blurb:

Salami battle in supermarket leaves Germans in hospital:

Two Germans needed hospital treatment after they fought a pitched battle in a supermarket with salamis used as clubs and a chunk of Parmesan cheese brandished like a dagger.

Oh, my!

And NO, I do NOT apologize for making the atrocious wordplay of both military history and food.