Nerd Journal: IT'S FINALS WEEK

What Finals Week is saying to me:

My reply:

Quote of the Day: The Wreck of Venezuela

And why has it come to this?  

The reason? A brain-dead rejection of basic economics, and a hardline, anti-market approach of the worst possible kind. There are maximum prices, other price controls, profit controls, capital controls, nationalisations, expropriations and every other statist, atavistic policy you can think of. An extreme left wing government has waged war on capitalism and won; and as ever, ordinary people are paying the price.

Oops, I Did It Again

The guy who inflicted Rebecca Black's gobsmackingly horrendous "Friday" song on the world has done it again.  This time it's even worse.  It's an unbelievably awful song about Chinese food.  Nope, if you want a song about Chinese food that's actually good and charming and not racially insulting, go here instead. 

Tweet of the Day: Kelly Clarkson on VMA Train Wreck

Can someone please tell Lady Gaga and Miley Cyrus that their 15 minutes of fame are up?  Kelly, on the hand, can actually sing. You go, girl. You throw that shade on tasteless exhibitionists who are addicted to tabloid attention.  Enough of this trash culture!

Just saw a couple performances from the VMA's last night. 2 words.... #pitchystrippers
— Kelly Clarkson (@kelly_clarkson) August 26, 2013

Nothing Is So Obvious That You Don't Have To Spell It Out

Quote of the day on the increasingly scandal-ridden British government health care deathtrap NHS:

People working in the NHS need to know that they, and not some faceless administrator, Whitehall mandarin or government minister, are responsible for what happens to patients in their care. 

I can't believe things have reached such a miserable depth that the editorialist actually felt he had to explain this to people working in the NHS.  RELATED: Here.

Haters Gonna Hate on Social Media

What an ugly, hateful display.  I'm glad to see someone of their own party call them out for it.  Thank you, Ms. Goldstein, for being a decent human being and calling on others to be likewise regardless of political party.  Anyway, courtesy and good manners never go out of style, no matter what side of the aisle you are!

Report Recommends China Should Move to Two-Child Policy

WELL, DUH.  

So just how many years did it take you to realize that the one-child policy and its ramifications, from gendercide to forced abortions to corrupt adoptions, are gross human rights violations that are also, by the way, wreaking havoc with society?

You Have Got to Be Freaking Kidding Me

NOOOOOOOO!

LOL Monday Therapy: Dutch Soccer Fans 1, Reporter 0

No matter how rough your Monday is at work, at least you're not this poor reporter.

Blast from the Past: Home Decor of the 1970s

Click at your own risk!

Hello Kitty Monstrosity of the Day: A Photo Gallery from Hell

I can't bear to look.  

Blog Post Title of the Day: "Thomas Friedman, You Pitiful Fool."

Is Tom Friedman a useful idiot and a pitiful fool?  Absolutely.  Now read this essay about Chinese dissident Liu Xiaobo, about whom I have posted before here and here.

James Delingpole on the NHS

Oh, my!

The Follies of Fenton: Sublimely Comic Despair

This is pretty much a perfect example of things spiraling out of your control and leaving you shaking your fists in impotent rage ... It's a perfect visual distillation of end-of-term exams!  In this case, though, it's about a misbehaving Labrador retriever named Fenton and his haplessly, hopelessly, hilariously exasperated owner and his increasingly desperate cries.  Take a look at what happened in Richmond Park near London (and why you should keep your dog on a leash):

Since we are living in the Internet age of magnificent meme-making, parodic mashups are inevitable.  These are my favorites:

'Tis The Season For Christmas Music Abuse

Yes, yes, I know that it's now officially December, so everyone has the technical right to play as many schmaltzy, cheesy versions of Christmas songs as they please.  I know that every shop and mall in the country is going to be blasting the stuff.  I do object, though, to Christmas music being played in restaurants.  

No, really!  I was just out for a nice meal with friends at a little Italian place, and the air was filled with that musical abuse.  It's a restaurant, people.  Can't I even have a meal in some peace?  Schmaltzy upbeat Christmas pop music is not "ambiance" or "atmosphere."  NOT IN AN ITALIAN PLACE.  NO WAY.  NOT EVER.  "Jingle Bell Rock" is an abomination.  I do NOT want to hear "All I Want for Christmas Is Yoooooooou" sung by some lame celebrity (and why does almost every quasi-celebrity in the entertainment business feel the compulsion to record Christmas songs?  STOP IT!) while I'm trying to eat.

Anyway, this isn't to say that I just Scroogerrifically hate all Christmas music.  I like good Christmas music.  Let me kick off the season with something nicer than craptastic versions of pop holiday ear-poison.   Try this instead -- the traditional first song of the annual Christmas Eve service at King's College, Cambridge. 

Once in Royal David's City

 (Come on, aren't these choir boys much better than Justin Bieber?  And, yes, in the name of fairness and objective research, I did actually attempt to listen to Bieber's Christmas effort.  I lasted about 1 minute.)  

Hello Kitty Monstrosity: the Thanksgiving Day Parade Balloon

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Not even on Thanksgiving Day can I escape the mouthless cartoon cat with ambitions of global domination!  I'm here watching the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade when suddenly my TV and my eyes are defiled -- defiled! -- by the image of a gigantic Hello Kitty balloon floating over the streets of New York City!  RUN!

History Nerd Fun: 10 Reasons to Go Back to the Dark Ages

This is a hilarious list.  Oh, never mind the fact that mortality rates for everybody were sky-high!  Dark Age denizens had organic veggies and plenty of exercise!  They had low unemployment and no obnoxious PAC lobbyists!  (Nope, they just had serfdom, nepotism, simony, indulgences, witch hunts, Viking raids, the Black Death, rampant illiteracy, no antibiotics, no indoor plumbing or electricity, and people like the Borgias calling the shots!  Plus no high-speed wireless Internet access!  Oh, the humanity.)

"Help, help, I'm being repressed!"

LOL: Rules for Snow Shoveling and Parking

Oh, this is hilarious.

Kitchen Notes: Is This Culinary Sin Forgivable?

A poor damned soul confesses that she enabled the total monstrosity that is Sandra Lee.  Oh, you say, to err is human ... to forgive, divine.  Oh, you say, the quality of mercy is not strained; it droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven upon the place beneath. It is twice blessed -- It blesseth him that gives, and him that takes.  OK, but I should tell you that this is the same poor damned soul who wrote the recipe for this nauseating atrocity and gave it to Sandra Lee.  Is this culinary sin forgivable?  I say only two words: corn nuts.

You miserable vomitous mass.

Kitchen Notes: Tofu Is Tofu, Not Meat!

Preach it, sister.  Real tofu is a glorious and delicious thing.  It's nothing like those atrocities that you see in fancypants health-food markets.  I love real tofu, but you will never in a million years get me to try tofurkey and its disgusting-looking ilk.  As for all the righteous-sounding excuse-making that vegetarians and vegans somehow "need" to mangle tofu in order to make meat substitutes out of it -- I DON'T CARE.  Making bad food is a crime, a sin, and an abomination. I don't care what the excuse is.   Do you know how I love my tofu?  WITH MEAT.  (Seriously.)